Dashed Expectations

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PostPosted: Sat Apr 19, 2014 10:50 am 
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Joined: Wed Aug 22, 2012 6:32 pm
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Location: Lively Town
Ship Name: SS DE-1701

Falcon6 -- Killed piloting the ship. Tried to repair it when a direct hit from enemy lasers pierced through him.
Raxy -- Killed by intruders while repairing the sensors. Didn't see that one coming.
Elby -- Killed while acting as a Defense Drone. Learned the hard ways that organic beings that require oxygen to sustain themselves make very poor Defense Drones.
Cruzader -- Killed after the ship's hull was destroyed. Basically just sat around and didn't pay attention to the mess happening around him.
animemangavg -- Killed by solar flare. He melted into a puddle of pimp.
DoM -- Death by loneliness.
FSLAR -- Killed fighting a mantis, one-on-one. There's a fine line between "be a badass" and "violation of common sense."
The Great B-Man -- Offered to slave traders after agreeing he offered nothing useful to the ship. Was later changed from "slave" to "rations" for the same reason. Lack of opposable thumbs to blame.
Chuckdorel -- Submitted to his Canadian traits and boarded a vessel in an attempt to make a peace talk with them. Got a laser in the head for his troubles. Apologized to the shooter.
McKnackus I -- Killed on a rescue mission because he's a nice guy. No survivors though.
Azure -- Killed by invaders suddenly beaming into his room. Failed ninja training finally caught up with him.
Super Penguin M -- Killed during pirate attack from stray laser...maybe? I dunno, when he died, nobody noticed until a few Jumps later.
Mecha -- Killed firing a Breach Bomb Mark II at own ship due to hating everyone on board. Misfired and ended up breaching a hole in his own room, draining him of oxygen.
Shredderman8160 -- Killed in a fire. He thought they were special effects for his rock show.
Bacon Supreme -- Killed making repairs. Forgot to check his own health while doing so.
Pikmanipulator -- Killed by own crew members after opening a window because he was "too hot." Nobody likes it when oxygen leaks out, y'know, spacesuit wearing or not.

tl;dr - Everyone died. Have a nice day!

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PostPosted: Sat Apr 19, 2014 12:09 pm 
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Joined: Sun Aug 19, 2012 10:48 pm
Posts: 1235
Location: Neptune
Hahaha, I was wondering how this would work when I saw the title, that's a pretty great approach to it, and clearly 100% accurate on all fronts forever and for always.


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PostPosted: Sat Apr 19, 2014 4:11 pm 
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Joined: Mon Aug 12, 2013 10:54 pm
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When a guy gets hot, he's gonna get shot.


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PostPosted: Mon Apr 21, 2014 10:28 am 
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Joined: Wed Aug 22, 2012 7:10 pm
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Location: Unknown, but it no doubt involves appliances found in the kitchen.
This is accurate.

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Azure- Failing his spy class training since the days of Old F6.
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